Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Screw Bravery. . . (or It's just too HOT!)

I've done something I SWORE I would not do this summer. I've complained about the heat over at my blog. (*hangs head*)

I am, however, managing to find an escape inside my favoritest summer read ever: Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury. I lurve it.

I've decided to combine what Ray did in this loverly book with my wild ranting about where I live.

And now. . . I bring you a reprisal of an assignment I did in my one and only graduate school semester so far. The directions were to write a short, succinct, sensory, and totally awesome take on the city in which you live. I'm pretty sure I had a word limit, though I don't remember what it was.

Without further ado:

"Living in Phoenix is like living under the dominion of a maniac adept at the acutest forms of torture. At every hour its inhabitants eek out their existence under the despotic heat of this Valley, waiting for the slow days to pass hour by sluggish hour. Twisted forms of distraction include watching sun tea boil in the shade, wax crayons melt together into colorful puddles on sidewalks, rented movies warp and shrivel into themselves on the dashboards of cars, and outside pets ritualistically climb in and out of plastic pools filled with muddy, tepid water.

The residents of Phoenix fall into two groups. Some seek out libraries and cafes where, faces pink and dripping with perspiration, they are assuaged by the refreshing air conditioned atmosphere while waiting for their laptops to boot up. These are they who take some small, albeit pitiable, degree of comfort in the sheer contemplation of visiting cooler places, who scour the web for good travel deals and plan getaway trips to beaches in California, Texas, and Mexico. Others, staring vacantly into oblivion, slump into overheated heaps on perimeter benches in “kid zones” at malls, lulled into stupor by the lethal combination of heat exhaustion and the high-pitched resonance of screaming children.

When both types come together in the parking lots, bitter rivalries ensue for parking spots proffering even the smallest smidgen of shade, with natives spewing angry threats to anyone who threatens to cut them off before they get there first. Where, rather than receiving compassion, those poor souls sans window tint or car shades are thought ignorant and rightly due the searing punishment that only the scorching interior of an automobile in such a condition can inflict."

So. That's it.

What's your take on life in your town this summer??

4 comments:

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

I was thinking about complaining about the heat but...

1) It's not half so hot here as there.

2) You've done it more poetically than I ever could.

Caroline C. Bingham said...

Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

I LOVE how we fight over the shadiest parking spots and not the closest ones. Only a true Arizonan can understand that.

Ryan said...

My take? Not as awesome as yours. That's a pretty piece of work. I know, because I didn't know the meaning of at least 3 words; that's always a great way to measure awesomeness in a piece of writing. (It was also not lame and not long--two other great indicaters of awesomeness.)

Trina said...

ok i am selfish to say that i, with two little grown children (not being carried on hip or carseat and un/buckle themselves), still fight for spaces at the places summer moms go with all of their smaller children. it reminds me of the jungle scenes in mean girls to imagine the parking lot scene, but it's kind laughable at the same time.